Souls Greater than the Sky
by RelativeWind
Summary: On the fifth anniversary of the Great War, a universe pauses to celebrate and remember. Lance continues his effort to help others embrace who Allura was. But when faced with a devastating revelation from the past, he finds his path forward harder than ever. Yet that turmoil is only a precursor to what happens when Pidge's unlikely discovery unearths long buried hopes…
1. Reflection

**Reflections**

There was a gentle breeze out of the south, just enough to move the flags of the more than one thousand worlds of the Galactic Coalition. The sun cut through a thin layer of clouds, illuminating more than a million beings that had converged on Altea to both celebrate the end of the great galactic conflict five years before, and to remember those who had so selflessly brought the war to a close.

Lance inhaled slowly as he stepped forward, his damp eyes unable to focus on the crowd before him. Over the past few years he had often shared his thoughts regarding Allura and the Paladins, but had strongly preferred doing so with small groups. Trying to express how he truly felt to so many was a daunting task, and one he had intentionally avoided.

At past events he had sat to the side as his friends had regaled crowds with their adventures and solemnly honored those who were no longer with them. Eventually he had run out of excuses, both those he had given to others and those he had told himself. He had known Allura like no one else had, and he had a duty to share her brilliance with the universe.

Slowly the rancorous cheers died away and only the sound of the wind broke the silence. The Paladin's lip twitched slightly. "I, uh… I'm going to do something I don't normally do today," he began, looking up from the podium. "I'm, you know, not normally a speech guy." There was a faint chuckle from behind him, and slight smile briefly touched his lips. "But this is important, because everything we are—and I mean everything—is because of those who sacrificed for it."

Lance glanced down at his prepared remarks. He'd spent the better part of two months writing and rewriting them. Eloquence had never been his strong suit, and despite countless revisions he was still unsure if the words truly conveyed what he desired to express. There was only one way to find out.

"Five years ago, the greatest conflict of all time came to an end. And while I understand the desire to celebrate, we can't forget those people who fought for our right to exist." He turned to look behind him where his fellow Paladins and other distinguished allies were seated. "Every face you see behind me has seen things no one should ever see. Felt pain that I can't describe." The Paladin swallowed and blinked, struggling to contain the emotions he felt welling within him. "And they… they would endure it again if they had too, because that is who they are."

"Most of the people they saved will never know who they are," he continued. "Countless souls in countless realities are here because of what they did. Because they gave everything they had; not for power or glory or even thanks. They did it because it was right. Because they believed that there was good in this universe; in every universe."

Lance took in a shallow breath and brushed a tear away from his right eye. "But I don't need to just believe anymore… I know. I've seen what binds us all together, what gives us our strength. "Because everything has been touched by her."

"Princess Allura," he continued, "Was the greatest person I've ever known. She was a diplomat, a soldier, a scientist, and the best friend anyone could ever ask for." A brief smile swept across his face. "Her bond with me was forged by a kind of love and respect that I never thought was possible. She touched my soul and changed my life. She inspired me to be something greater than I ever believed I could be. She was the closest thing to perfection I have ever seen."

"I loved her," Lance said softly. After a moment of contemplation, a smile formed on his lips. "Some people say love is the triumph of feelings over intelligence; I guess that's why it was one thing I was pretty good at. Not that I was ever good enough for her. No one could ever be, because she was the kind of person that always made you want to be better."

There was a long pause as the Paladin once again valiantly fought back encroaching tears. He had made peace with her passing, accepting that her choice was what had to be. Despite that, discussing his most cherished memories still stirred strong emotions within him.

"I wanted to spend every moment of my life with her. And in a way, I get to. Everything you touch, everything you see is because of her. Her life is in every flower you hold in hand, every meteor streaking across a dark sky. Everyone one you love, have loved, and will ever lover. All of it is because she willingly gave us everything she had."

The tall Paladin put down his pad, and looked out over the crowd. "I miss her terribly, but I know she will never be truly gone. I can't say what happens to us when we move on to that next stage of life, but I know it is not the end. And I know, one day, I'll be able to hold her hand again."

Another deep breath. "Grief is painful, but not bad. It reveals how someone changed us, and in very rare cases, how someone changed everything. It pulls back the curtain, and lets us see truths that we never saw before. That's why I'm here: I want you all to see the universe she saw, the reality she made the greatest sacrifice for. To see the good and the love that is in each of us." His voice was growing stronger now as his thoughts turned to the immense pride he felt for the woman he loved. "Because to me Allura is not simply a hero, she is an example. She shows us what we can be, what we should strive to be every day. She teaches us to seek out the good in others, to cherish what we have in common while we celebrate what makes us unique. To be more together than we could ever be on our own!"

Lance's gaze drifted downward as the crowd erupted in cheers. He felt mentally and physically exhausted in a way he had not experienced for a long time. Slowly he turned away from the podium to find Keith standing behind him.

"You're not as bad at that speech thing as I would have thought," the Black Paladin said, the faintest hint of a smile on his face. "Normally I can't wait for you to _stop_ talking but… that was something special. Something she really deserved."

"I can never really give her what she deserves," Lance said, his words barely audible over the sound of the crowd. "None of us can."

"Maybe not," Keith replied, pulling his friend into a warm embrace. "But you're doing the best anyone can by helping them see who she was." Keith slid his hands to both of Lance's shoulder, grasping his friend firmly. "Making sure they never forget what she stood for."

Lance inhaled deeply, then pressed his lips together into a tight, emotional smile and followed his fellow Paladin back to their seats.

* * *

A/N: After seeing the finale, I felt that there was more to say. My other Voltron story discusses the relationship between Lance and Allura, and spending so much time focusing on their thoughts about each other it was definitely moving to see them torn apart. After drafting my initial reaction (which takes the form of Lance's speech) the rest of the story started to materialize...

As always, thank you for taking the time to read, fave, and follow and a tremendous thanks to those that take the time to review. It is truly appreciated!


	2. Friendship

Friendship

Lance hung his uniform jacket carefully in the small room's closet. It had been nearly two years since he'd last wore it, and it had felt bizarre putting it on for the speech. The uniform belonged to the man he had been. He was proud of his past, but he had painfully learned the importance of moving forward. Though technically still recallable to active duty, Lance's only recent business at Galaxy Garrison had been to visit friends and family and, on rare occasions, to speak to small groups of cadets.

Lance's decision to leave active duty had been a surprise to everyone. Passions that had once burned brightly within him now seemed trivial. He privately attributed it to Allura's influence. On several occasions he'd felt like he was recalling experiences he couldn't really remember, but that influenced his thinking. He wasn't sure if such feelings were shadows of her somehow passed on through their bond or merely creations of his subconscious, but it didn't really matter. In his heart he felt compelled to listen.

In a few minutes he would join his fellow Paladins and Coran at their annual dinner. He looked forward to it; while he was fortunate to see many of his friends throughout the year it was rare that all the remaining Paladins had a chance to be together. It was a chance to be a family again, to remember the good and the bad. To laugh often, cry occasionally, and talk about things no one else could ever understand.

"So I told him that a bimodal wave pattern wasn't going to help him fly his ship, but it might help him heat the soup!"

Hunk and Coran laughed heartily at the punchline of Pidge's story. Shiro favored her with a smile. Lance and Keith exchanged confused glances.

"That's why you don't use flormine filters in your multispectral scanners," Hunk added through his chuckling.

"Speaking of scanners," Shiro said, looking directly at Pidge, "how's that new project of yours coming?"

"Very well, actually. We've finally stabilized the capacitive diractance in the Hesiod Array," Pidge said excitedly.

Lance cocked an eyebrow. He didn't get that one either. "And that means?"

"It only means the most powerful sensor system ever developed is ready to go online," Hunk said excitedly.

"The Array will have twenty times the resolution of the Atlas's sensors, and several thousand times the range," Pidge added. "It will help us understand more about our universe than ever before."

"All from the comfort of Earth." Hunk smiled. "My kind of research."

"I assume it has defense applications as well," Keith said.

"Plenty," Pidge said. "We can detect a wormhole opening anywhere in the Milky Way and even in some of the surrounding galaxies."

"I'm glad at least one of us has something new and exciting to discuss tomorrow morning," Shiro replied.

Keith tensed slightly. "What's tomorrow morning?"

Hunk frowned. "You forgot about the show?"

Keith's eyes widened. "I thought you were joking. We've always turned down the group interview requests."

"It's the fifth anniversary," Pidge said. "We all agreed to it."

"When Shiro brought it up you said 'Sure, whatever'," Lance reminded his friend.

"That _does_ sound like Keith," Hunk confirmed.

"But… I didn't think any of you would want to do it," Keith huffed.

"I don't want to do it," Lance said.

"Neither do I," Pdige concurred.

"Then why the quiznack are we doing it?" Keith demanded.

"I don't know… it could be fun," Hunk mused.

"It isn't about what we want," Lance explained. He was pretty sure this was the same conversation they'd had a phebe earlier when they had originally made a decision about the show. "There are things that people should know, and this is a way to share them."

"Like what the blue spots are?" Keith said with a smirk.

Lance shrugged. "OK, yeah, that one gets kind of old. Though apparently they mean I might have a claim to the Altean throne."

Pidge's eyes went wide and she dropped her spoon. "What?"

"King Lance of Altea," Shiro mused. "They could do worse."

"But it would be a challenge," Keith added smugly.

Pidge shook her head. "You're going to need to explain this one to me."

"Apparently since I was the consort of the last royal in the previous lineage, I have the right to be heard as a potential successor."

Hunk frowned slightly. "Wait… you might become King because you were _dating her_?"

"When Egaran the Fickle passed he had no direct heir," Coran said. "His consort of the time _was_ considered as a successor, but ultimately it was decided Egaran's Uncle held a greater claim. Of course, we all know how _that_ turned out."

A mischievous smirk crossed Shiro's lips. "What do you think Coran? Are you ready to pledge your allegiance to Lance?"

"Given the newest Altean charter I don't see it as likely… but…" His gaze shifted to Lance. "I know you would make a fine king. But I also know your true passions lie elsewhere, and I respect that."

"That means a lot coming from you."

"So you're not going to pursue it," Keith said firmly. It was more a statement than a question.

Lance let out a soft chuckle. "Of course not. I can barely run a farm, I'm not going to try for a planet."

"You didn't do too bad helping to save the universe though," Pidge pointed out.

"You guys did most of the heavy lifting."

"We were a team," Shiro reminded his friend.

"Yeah," Lance said, almost wistfully. "I miss that a lot."

"Me too," Pidge agreed.

"Me three," Hunk added playfully.

"I know what you mean," Keith said. "There was something special about going out and making a difference every day. And doing it together."

"I am grateful for the experience every day," Coran said. "Waking up to a changed universe was not easy, but you all helped me endure it."

"We would have been lost without you Coran," Shiro said.

"Well," the suddenly emotional-looking Altean said, "It was my privilege."

Shiro raised a glass. "To the team!"

"To the team," the rest echoed.

Keith turned to Lance and raised an eyebrow. "When I say Vol, you say Tron."

The Cuban Paladin smirked. "Come on Keith. Grow up."

He stood on the upper observation deck with hands clasped behind his back looking out at the great statue of Allura. There were three of them now; the original continued to stand proudly on Altea while nearly identical replica had been erected on Earth as part of the Unity Memorial. A towering third statue had recently been completed on Daibazaal, and the shadow of Allura now graced the gardens of the new Great Senate Building of the Galra Republic. But to Lance, none of them captured her beauty quite as well as the one found on her former home.

"You're up late."

Lance spun around, though he didn't need to. Keith's voice was instantly recognizable. "So are you."

"I don't need as much beauty sleep as you do."

Lance let out a snorted laugh. "You're thinking about the interview tomorrow." He glanced down at his chronometer. "Today, actually."

"I'm the one that never liked this stuff," Keith pointed out. "Six years ago you'd of been clamoring for the camera."

The taller Paladin shrugged. "People change."

"Yeah," Keith said softly. "I don't think either of us thought we'd be who we are today."

"Tell me about it." He turned back to the statue. "Because of her."

"Because of all of us. Even you."

Lance looked back over his shoulder with a smug grin. "Don't go blaming me for your problems."

"I'm serious man."

"So am I."

An opening door prompted both men to turn around. Lance squinted as a short figure emerged from the shadows. "Pidge?"

"I thought I might find you up here," the youngest Paladin announced. "I stopped by your room but no one answered."

"I could've been asleep," Lance suggested.

"That's why I did a thermal scan to see if you were inside."

"You did _what?_ " Lance asked with obvious concern.

Pidge looked slightly hurt. "Low resolution only. I wouldn't have seen anything."

"Certainly not at low resolution," Keith interjected smugly.

Pidge frowned. "Can you stow your innuendos until I'm done here?"

"I didn't know you were doing something here?"

"Actually," Pidge said, pulling a small memory crystal from my pocket, "I wanted to give this to Lance." She turned to Lance. "I would have given it to you at dinner, but it took longer to compile to the crystal than I expected."

Lance furrowed his brow. "What is it?"

"Galaxy Garrison's copy of sensor and recorder data from the Blue Lion," she explained.

"I thought Sam said he couldn't decrypt the internal logs?"

Pidge smiled. "He couldn't. But I figured it out. At least some of it." She handed the crystal to Lance. "There's still a ton of stuff we don't understand about Voltron, but at least some of the records should be viewable. I haven't actually checked: What's on there is between you, Blue, and Allura."

"Wow… I, don't know what to say."

"Nothing from Red or Black?" Keith asked.

"Each Lion's encryption is unique and incredibly complex. I'll keep working on the others, of course, but Blue's was a little bit different. Almost like it wanted me to be able to figure it out."

Her eyes shifted back to Lance. "Maybe there's something on here Blue wanted you to see."

Lance closed his fist around the small crystal and pressed it up against his chest, feeling a sense of warmth. "Thank you," he said. "This… is something special."

* * *

A/N: Sorry this was a bit delayed. I wanted to rewatch S8 to make sure the storyline made sense, plus I've been revising my plans for the story a bit to make the plot a smidge more complex. I know the first couple chapters have been quite a bit of reminiscing, but they are needed to set the stage for the new adventure.

I hope you enjoyed, and any feedback is greatly appreciated!

Thank you!


	3. Supposition

**Supposition**

"Is he here yet?" Shiro asked as he fidgeted with his tie.

"Not yet," Keith said without attempting to hide his frustration. "If he bails on us…"

"Since when does Lance bail on us?" Hunk asked.

"That's what has me worried," Shiro replied. "This isn't like him."

"I'll check with Pidge," Hunk said, stepping out of the dressing room and crossing the hall to where the youngest of the Paladins was getting ready. He knocked on the door and waited for Pidge to acknowledge before entering.

Unlike the men who had chosen suits of various degrees of formality, Pidge had elected to wear her uniform. As the only former Paladin who was still on active duty it made chance, but it contrasted sharply with the more casual vibes Hunk's attire.

"We still haven't seen Lance," Hunk explained.

Pidge scrunched up her forehead. "That's strange."

"Yeah. I was wondering if you'd heard anything."

"No… hold on." She removed as small pad from one of her pants pockets. "If I can interface with the—there—let's see if he's left the Palace." After a few ticks she looked up. "As far as I can tell he hasn't left the guest area since I saw him early this morning."

"Early this morning?" Hunk asked. That seemed strange. "I know it's not really my business, but if Lance is missing…"

"I understand. He was with Keith on the observation deck and I stopped by to give him a data crystal with some records from Blue."

"Nice. You think he could have gotten caught up looking at those and lost track of time?"

Pidge shrugged. "It's possible… I think he would have eventually noticed the sun come up though."

Hunk glanced down at his chronometer. "We better get out there."

They arrived on the set to find the others were already present and conversing with a producer.

"We sold this as the first interview with all the Paladins in over four years," the man said with obvious frustration.

"Not _all_ of the Paladins survived the war," Keith said sharply.

The man looked briefly flustered but quickly regained his composure. "I'm sorry, I chose my words poorly. But what I am trying to say is that an _entire universe_ is expecting to see five of you in three dobashes. This could ruin my reputation."

"As I said, I don't know what happened," Shiro said as diplomatically as he could manage. The producer's fixation on the show and apparent disregard for Lance's well-being was starting to grate on him. "I can assure you Lance would not skip this without good reason."

"I'm sure he wouldn't," a tall, slender Altean interjected. "I may not know Lance well," she continued, "but he has a reputation of not taking his commitments lightly."

"You'll need to figure out how to make up the extra time," the producer told her. He glanced at his chronometer. "We can't rewrite the questions in ninety ticks."

"We're pretty quick on our feet," Pidge said. "We had to be."

The producer frowned. "This was built up into something big," he told the Altean. "The network executives will not be happy it if doesn't live up to the hype."

The tall Altean pursed her lips for a moment, then smiled. "It will be fine," she said gently. "I'm sure our discussion will be most exciting for the viewers."

"It better be," the man replied. "It's not just _my_ head if the execs don't like it. Your contract is up for renewal; if you can't make a splash with this there could be serious repercussions."

The Altean's expression cooled for a moment, but the broad smile quickly returned. She motioned to a row of comfortable chairs arranged in a semi-circle. "If you're ready?"

The four Paladins took their places while the Altean remained standing in the center of the semi-circle. The lighting shifted and after a brief countdown she addressed the cameras.

"Welcome. I'm Amozel, and thank you for joining me for this special broadcast. We are coming to you live from the United Galactic Networks studios on Altea, and it is my honor and privilege to be joined today by four members of the Voltron team. The courageous efforts of Voltron gave the free people of the universe the support and hope they needed to challenge their oppressors, and brought ten thousand years of darkness to an end."

Amozel walked towards her seat as she continued. "The humble Paladins are all quick to point out that millions of individuals courageously fought to overthrow the tyranny of Galra Empire, but the importance of Voltron cannot be understated. They sacrificed selflessly to protect worlds and people they barely knew from the greatest threats ever unleashed on the universe."

She sat down and swiveled her chair to face the Paladins. "Takashi Shirogane is the former commander of Voltron and later the captain of Earth's first large cruiser, the IGF Atlas. He retired from active duty three years ago as a Vice Admiral and perhaps the greatest living hero on his home planer. Commander Shirogane, it is truly an honor to speak with you again."

Shiro smiled slightly, looking a bit uncomfortable with the praise he was being given. "It is good to be here Amozel. And please, call me Shiro… we all prefer first names." He turned to face directly into the camera. "It is important for me to remind everyone that there were a lot of people beyond us that made what Voltron did possible. Various rebel cells, the Blade of Marmora, Galaxy Garrison, and so many more."

Keith leaned forward. "It isn't just us being humble. The truth is we were not prepared for what we had to do. Without the support of those around us we never could have been successful. And that doesn't even begin to the scratch the surface of what those millions you mentioned did."

"I think a lot of those people would argue you are underselling yourselves," Amozel said.

"Maybe," Hunk said, "but in the end what's most important is people across the universe are safe and free."

"Well said," Amozel agreed. "Speaking of things which are well said, a lot of us were greatly moved by the speech yesterday. I was curious if you had any reactions?" This was a question that had not been discussed in earlier meetings, and a series of quick glances were exchanged amongst the Paladins as they contemplated who would answer.

Keith leaned forward in his chair. "What you need to know is the guy meant every word he said."

"Lance isn't normally so eloquent," Pidge added with the hint of a smirk. "He only talks that way when he's discussing something he really cares about."

"It was probably the most emotional speech of the day," Amozel said. "I assume that was driven by his personal relationship with Allura."

Shiro straightened slightly, his attention piqued. An unplanned question about the speech was reasonable, but digging into Lance's personal life without him present did not sit well with the former leader of Voltron. "We've all had to face loss," he said, careful not to let any hint of his frustration into his voice. "War forces us to experience a lot of painful things. We lose people. We have to make choices with terrible consequences. And while we are fighting, we need to push aside our emotions and focus on the mission. But when you call back those memories after the fact, the emotions are still there."

"So you would agree that the experience was very traumatic for Lance?"

"I think I answered that question best I can-or should," Shiro said with a bit of an edge to his voice. "If you want to know how he was impacted, you would need to ask him. Just as you would with _anyone else_."

"It just seems a bit unusual," Amozel replied, her tone still calm and friendly. "The man makes an impressive and emotional speech one day, then suddenly and inexplicably disappears the next. It seems to reinforce some concerns."

"What kind of concerns?" Keith asked sharply. Unlike Shiro, he made no attempt to hide his displeasure.

"Since the war, Lance has given up a promising career with the Galactic Alliance, turned down numerous other opportunities in favor of employment on a small farm, and only speaks sporadically to small groups—and then, rarely on camera. I've spoken with some of his former classmates at Galaxy Garrison who describe an outgoing, almost flamboyant person. Many of my colleagues have also been led to believe Lance was a very different man before the war."

"People change," Pidge interjected firmly. " _We all changed_."

"Yes, but is the change healthy, or has the loss of Allura and the horrors of war driven Lance to a damaging mental breakdown?"

"Whoa, hold on," Hunk said, putting out his large hand in a motion to stop. "First of all, that doesn't make any sense, and second of all, it isn't any of your business."

Amozel flashed her most disarming smile. "After everything the Lance has done the entire universe is in his debt. His suffering is part of that sacrifice, part of the story that defines him."

"No," Keith said, a harsh edge to his words. "That is _not_ the story." He pointed his index finger directly at Amozel. "That will _never be_ the story."

"What defines Lance," Shiro added, "is his commitment to others and a belief in doing good. Anything else is an attempt to twist questionable facts into a sensationalist headline."

"I think you misunderstand my purpose here," Amozel said defensively, her tone carefully calculated to engender sympathy amongst her viewers. "After what he's done, it is our duty to help him in any way we can. But to do that, we need to know what is wrong. And to the objective observer, something certainly seems wrong."

"Nothing is _wrong_ ," Pidge snapped defensively.

"Other than you making up crazy stories about our friend," Hunk stated. The heavily-built Paladin was visibly upset about the effort to malign his friend.

"Then tell me what you know and we can set the record straight," Amozel replied.

"So you can manipulate our words into something that will boost your career?" Pidge asked. "No thanks."

"I understand your desire to protect him," Amozel continued, "But resistances and obfuscation only raises further questions."

Keith abruptly got to his feet. "I'm out."

"Me too," Hunk announced before following Keith from the set.

"Lance made choices about how he wanted to live," Pidge said. "It isn't your job to judge the decisions he made." With that she stood and walked off in the direction of her friends.

Shiro remained seated, his eyes narrowing as he glared at Amozel. The Altean looked back at him, her neutral expression honed by deca-phebes of on camera experience. "All I'm asking for is a discussion," she said calmly. "Without your comments, our audience is forced to draw their own conclusions. I don't understand why you are so reluctant to participate."

"There is only one thing you need to understand," Shiro said, his tone frigid. Any hint of his earlier calm façade was gone. "If you go after a member of my team, you have to go through me."

* * *

A/N: Once Space Dad, always Space Dad…

Please note, a disingenuous reporter is not the main problem facing Lance and the team… As the story developed I ended up adding some additional threads...

As always, I hope you enjoyed, and any feedback is greatly appreciated! Thank you!


	4. When the Light Dims

**When the Light Dims**

"Whatever happens, we'll deal with it," Shiro assured the others as the transport sped back to the palace. While he shared the teams surprise and anger, his greatest frustration stemmed from his own inability to prevent the problem. He had sensed the interviewer's subtle shift in questioning but had failed to intervene effectively. Instead they had all become defensive, giving unintended credence to her baseless statements.

"I don't care what they say," Keith said defiantly. "We know the truth."

"Yeah, but it's kind of tough if the whole galaxy thinks you're going crazy." Hunk looked at the window as they approached the palace's outer grounds. "It's easy to say you shouldn't care what other people think. It's harder to do it."

"The truth will come out," Pidge said. "Honestly, I'm more worried that he skipped out on us in the first place."

"Pidge is right," Shiro said. "The first priority is finding out what's going on with Lance."

Coran was already waiting for them at the main entrance as the transport slowed to a stop. "I am as astonished and dismayed as you are," he said as the Paladins exited the vehicle. "The actions of that reporter were nothing short of, well, disgraceful. I assure you I will be lodging a formal protest with—"

"Coran," Keith interrupted. "Where's Lance?"

"Lance?" the Altean replied with some confusion. "Did he not tell you? He sent a message to my office this morning saying he was ill. Naturally I offered to have a Palace medic check in on him but he asked not to be disturbed." The older man's eyebrows dipped. "Did he not pass you a similar message?"

Hunk shook his head. "No… not a word."

"He seemed fine when Pidge and I spoke to him before bed," Keith said.

"It is flimrak season," Coran offered, "but it would be very unusual for it to develop that quickly."

"I think we need to pay him a visit," Pidge said.

"Of course," the Altean agreed, "but may I suggest only one or two of you go. I understand your concern, but I assume he requested to be alone for a reason."

"Coran is right," Hunk added. "We need to find out what's up, but we don't want him to feel like we're pushing him. If it's serious enough for him to be acting this way, I don't want to risk him shutting us out."

"I agree." Shiro's eyes flicked across the Paladins. "Hunk, Keith, why don't you check in on Lance. Pidge and I'll stay here with Coran in case you need us." In truth, Shiro wanted to check on Lance himself, but acknowledged he wasn't the best person for the job. Hunk had known Lance longer than any of them, and their friendship was unbreakable. And despite a litany of differences, Keith and Lance had forged an incredible bond of mutual respect.

Keith and Hunk exchanged glances. They had rang the doorbell, knocked, and even tried to raise Lance on the intercom. After five dobashes, nothing had brought their friend to the door.

"We have to go in," Keith said firmly.

Hunk was a bit more hesitant. "Maybe there's a simple explanation," he said hopefully.

"Maybe, but there could also be a bad one."

Hunk slumped slightly. "You're right." He pulled the door panel off the wall and entered a supervisory code Coran had given him. After a brief delay, the door slid open.

The room was in chaos. Clothing was strewn across floor, along with the broken remains of several hangers and a piece of cabinetry. A large chair rested against a glass-topped table, undamaged by balanced precariously. Amongst the mess Keith immediately spotted two blue slippers left haphazardly on the floor, each a plush avatar of Lance's first Lion.

Lance himself was laying on the bed, his chest moving with his slow, deep breathing. His eyes were open, but continued to glare aimlessly at the ceiling even as the other Paladin's approached. There was a noticeable cut above his right eye, accentuated by dry blood. Several bottles of various sizes adorned the nightstand, and the foul stench emanating from the bathroom suggested Lance had consumed far too many of them.

Hunk was unsure what to say. Over a decade of friendship he had seen Lance's highs and lows. Seen him suffer from personal and professional rejection. Seen him blame himself for things that were and weren't his fault. He'd never seen this.

"Are you OK?" Hunk asked. He resisted the urge to pull Lance upright when there was no reply.

Keith looked over the assorted bottles, recognizing about half of the labels. It seemed unlikely Lance could have downed that much alcohol in the varga since the interview; something else must have driven his friend into this miserable state.

Without a word Keith sat down on the edge of the bed. He reached out, gently touching Lance's shoulder and apply slight pressure. He could see his friend's eyes twitch in his direction, looking almost alien. The dark blue eyes, normally vivid and burning with life and purpose, seemed to fester with melancholy and sorrow.

"I'm here when you need me," Keith said gently. Whatever was going on, Lance was going to tell them about it in his own time and way.

Shiro put down his communicator and turned to face Pidge. "That was Admiral Iverson. Apparently they've been getting numerous media requests about Lance."

"What are they doing about it?" Pidge asked.

"Nothing, for now." Shiro pressed his lips together and inhaled through his nose. "He's a good man. He's not going to sell anyone out."

"Why do they even care?" Pidge asked in frustration. "He retired. He's a private citizen like anyone else."

"Its human nature," Shiro answered quietly. "People love gossip, especially about someone famous."

"And people wonder why I like machines." She shook her head. "We didn't choose to be famous. We did what we had to."

Shiro nodded knowingly. "You don't realize the blessing of anonymity until it's gone."

"I remember the press Matt, Dad and you got when they announced the Kerboros mission," Pidge said quietly. "I guess nothing could have prepared you for Voltron though." She looked towards the door, then down at her chronometer, then back at the door.

"I know," Shiro said in response to the unspoken statement. "I'm worried too. But I'm sure Hunk and Keith will let us know if Lance needs us."

"I just hate waiting." She exhaled slowly. "What about Lance's family? Have they heard yet?"

"I don't know," Shiro admitted. "Iverson's sending Griffin to Cuba to help them with anything they need, including running interference with anyone trying to bother them."

Pidge faked a smile. "Those reporters won't want to get on his bad side." Her eyes widened slightly. "Veronica is still on Proxima Gamma, isn't she?"

Shiro nodded. "Communication blackout from the radiation for another week. Hopefully by the time she hears about this everything is resolved."

"Hopefully," Pidge murmered doubtfully. "I'd feel a lot better if I knew what was going on."

"Me too," Shiro admitted. "Me too."

Hunk and Keith exchanged silent glances for what felt like the hundredth time. They'd been with Lance for at least a varga, but other than his breathing and a few unpleasant sounding dry heaves he had remained quiet.

Hunk finally broke the silence. "Should I tell them what's going on?" he asked quietly.

"I don't know," Keith admitted. He looked down at his friend. Lance had rolled over to face the small window, but his eyes were closed. Keith suspected he had turned away from them in a subtle attempt to dissuade further conversation, but he was not going to be discouraged easily. "Lance?"

The Cuban shifted his shoulders slightly in response, but didn't say anything.

"I want to help," Keith said, a familiar sense of discomfort in his chest. Lance was one of his closest friends and confidants, yet this kind of conversation still failed to come easily to him. "I know I'm not always the best at this stuff, but..." He took a long, slow breath and lowered his head. "I don't know what's going on, but… but what I do know is you don't need to face it alone. You never do. No matter what happens, we'll always be here for you. For each other."

"I've seen you overcome so much," Hunk said, trying to force a small smile onto his concerned face. "You can pretty much get through anything. But I still hate to see you hurting like this, so I want to help."

Keith waited several ticks for a response. "If you want someone else…" Keith suggested. "I can get Shiro or—" He stopped when Lance groaned weakly and rolled onto his back, now open eyes staring blankly at the ceiling.

"I know you won't leave," Lance said in a weak, hoarse voice that was barely above a whisper, "but there is nothing to say."

"I've never liked talking about personal things," Keith reminded him truthfully. "But I learned that sometimes you need to, and making someone drag it out of you doesn't help anyone."

Lance turned his head slightly, bleary red eyes shifting briefly towards Keith before looking back at the ceiling. "There are wounds that no one can heal," Lance replied, "Pain that… that you can't fix, or maybe shouldn't fix."

"Maybe we can't fix everything," Hunk admitted, "but we can do something."

"There isn't anything anyone can do." He paused, his disconsolate mind trying to push aside the effect of alcohol as he considered his words. "Bad stuff is part of life... but when it shouldn't of happened, that's… when it hurts the most."

Keith hesitated, a driving desire to learn more tempered by a fear of making whatever Lance was going through more traumatic. The wrong question could make things worse and drive Lance father into whatever anguish had consumed him. Inaction, however, was not Keith's style. "Sometimes there are reasons for things we don't understand," Keith said gently. "How could you know something shouldn't have happened?"

Lance's eyes continued to stare aimlessly ahead, but his expression seemed to harden and the muscles in his jaw tensed noticeably. "Because everything could have been different."

* * *

A/N: Apologies for the long delay. Windows update managed to revert this story to an earlier version. Revision work, combined with other commitments, resulted in this taking way longer than it should have!

As always, thanks for taking time to read, fave, and follow, and an extra-special thank you to those who review!


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